You Can Do This

Kim over at Texting My Pancreas had a great idea:

The "You Can Do This" project! It's an opportunity for the DOC to come together, to offer up your story in video, to speak about the burdens and difficulty of this disease, and to encourage each other that we CAN do this.

Ever since her debut of the project on June 1, I've been thinking about this a lot. I've been thinking about what kind of video I might make, how I might be able to make a contribution to this project.

And I must admit, I'm a bit stumped.

I haven't been living with this disease all that long, especially compared with some of those in the launch video. Have I really been at this long enough to encourage others? Sixteen months does not an expert make.

What's more, I am very fortunate when it comes to my mental health. My darling husband might disagree on occasion (don't we all get a little crazy sometimes?), but in truth, I have not had any real issues with depression, anxiety, or anything else. Sure, I have blue days. And sure, some of those probably stem from my chronic condition. But, I have no words of wisdom, no experiences to speak about.

I know that I'm lucky, that I've somehow been hardwired to tackle problems head on, to approach even the most personal situations with logic first. I haven't overcome any struggles. I've had a few bad days in a row, but not enough to cause burn out. No ruts to fight my way out of.

When I was first diagnosed, I would sometimes have bad nights where I did a little too much googling about complications. But that stopped long ago. Maybe it's because I now know there is only so much I can do and am doing my best at it. Maybe it's because I know that this is a lifelong battle and I can't entangle my emotions too much with the hour-to-hour drama that is diabetes.

Being diagnosed at the age of 26 was a huge shock to the system and required me to change my life in all sorts of ways. It changed my relationships with people. It changed my relationship to food. To my body. To my future.

But it's who I am now. I tell myself every day that I can do this. What other option do I have?

And that's not a very hopeful message. It works for me, but I'm not sure that it's the approach for everyone.

But maybe I'm wrong. We'll see what video I come up with. I may not get it ready in time for the official launch on June 15, but I will contribute something. I need this community of voices. It helps remind me every day that I can do this, and I need to give back. Even if I don't have years of experience and stories of overcoming the worst. Maybe my story can help someone.