One thing I read this evening proved to be disheartening. I found this on the New York Times' Health page on this particular disease. Under the "Outlook (Prognosis)" section, you can find the following: "The outcome for people with diabetes varies. Studies show that tight control of blood glucose can prevent or delay complications to the eyes, kidneys, and nervous system. However, complications may occur even in those with good diabetes control."
Frustrating. This constant struggle may be, in the end, for nothing? What good is a blind art historian?
Then I decided I needed some optimism. I was thinking about my endocrinologist and her research. She is a founding member of a pharmaceutical group that is developing a gene therapy to basically restart the insulin-producing areas of the pancreas. These are called the Islets of Langerhans. Fun name, no?
Anyhow, I googled "Type 1 Diabetes Cure," just to see what I'd find. Did you know that they cured diabetes in mice? It's true.
This puts me in a weird spot, somewhere between disheartened and hopeful. I don't like to get my hopes up, but at the same time we live in a time when medicine is advancing at a rapid pace. I would love for there to be a cure. I'd do just about anything to be rid of this. But. I'm the kind of person who prefers to deal with things as they are in the present. I do look forward, I'm the queen of long-term planning and goal-setting, but I also get discouraged if I dwell too long on the idea of a cure. I try to just focus on what is going to get me through this day. What do I need to do, when do I need to test, how much of this can I eat, how did my body respond to that meal, and on and on.
Maybe someone should take my computer away at night. It gets me all pensive and a bit dispirited. Maybe I need to google "Cute kittens" instead.
I have a feeling that you're like me. Being unsure, not knowing, drives us crazy. So we seek as much information as possible, we dwell on it. At a certain point though there is nothing more useful we can do with the information and we end up spinning our wheels. I drove myself crazy reading about clotting factors and thinking about it all the time. A more complete diagnosis went a long way to quell some of that, but I'm still playing mental games with myself on occasion. I ended up seeing a psychologist to help me deal with the anxiety. I only went for one visit, but it was really helpful. Having a disinterested party to talk to can be liberating and he gave me some strategies for dealing with stress and anxiety.
ReplyDeleteHey Jasmine - I found your blog through Karen's this morning. Nice to meet you! I've had type 1 for 23 years, and I totally agree that Dr. Google is crap at soothing any fears. But just to help you sleep a little better at night, I've been diabetic for a long time, have virtually no complications, and I just had a baby. :) There's plenty of GOOD life after diagnosis, so don't lose heart.
ReplyDeleteAlso, this: http://kittenwar.com/
Much better than Googling diabetes crap. :)
If there's anything I can help with, please let me know!
- Kerri.